If you haven’t done so already, please read “Seven Signs That Your Wife is Cheating”. That post has been a huge eye-opener for many men who have that “gut feeling” that something was wrong and they needed a little nudge in the right direction.
So, your wife is showing signs that she cheated on you, but you just aren’t 100% certain yet? Spoke to an attorney and they suggested you gather as much evidence as you can? Not sure you’ll be able to find out what you need? Worried you’ll be stuck in a state of limbo forever? Trust me… if she’s up to no good, you can find out. It may take a little bit of detective work, but she has slipped up somewhere and failed to cover her tracks. They all do.
It’s all about the phone.
If your wife is having an affair, she is definitely in regular communication with her affair partner. She is most likely doing so via her phone. She MAY be smart and use a second “burner” phone for her communication, but most likely she is using her regular every day phone. Going back and forth between phones would get annoying really fast. There’s always a chance that the burner phone gets found (and that would be tough to explain away) and hiding the phone means that responses to her lover’s messages will be delayed. Remember, she’s an addict, so she’s going to need her fix and she’s going to need it often. She can’t go long periods of time without communicating with her Lover.
Ideally, you would like to get your hands on her phone. How? Maybe you can look at it while she sleeps at night. Maybe you can grab it out of her purse when she’s not looking and hide it away. She’ll just think she lost it. Who cares if she orders a new one. It’s a small price to pay for gathering the evidence you need.
If you do get your hands on her phone, you want to first backup the phone data, including all of the messages and emails (this is important). After that is done, you want to start scrolling through her phone and look for:
- Text messages
- Photos. Check deleted photos!
- Facebook and Messenger apps
- Email. Check deleted emails! Sent folder!
- Other messaging apps like Whatsapp and Kik.
- Check social media apps like Instagram that have direct messages.
- Look for Snapchat. There is no reason for a grown woman to have Snapchat.
While going through her phone, if you see anything that is incriminating, take a photo of her screen with YOUR phone. Save those photos and guard them with your life. Make sure she can’t ever see them. Email them to a separate account she knows nothing about, or directly to your attorney.
If you aren’t finding anything, it could be that she is being smart and erasing evidence as she goes. But, all is not lost. Remember the backup you made of her phone data? There are tools available that can go into the backup and bring back SOME of the texts and photos that she deleted. There are still traces of deleted data on the phone’s harddrive, and recovery programs are good at finding it.
The phone bill.
There’s always the trusty phone bill to fall back on. Sometimes the cheating wife forgets that the calls are all logged. Sometimes, if it’s not an iphone-to-iphone message, the bill will record who her text messages were sent to… and if the messages were just text or contained media (like photos). Logon to your telephone carrier account online, and check out recent bills. Find something? Save it. Send to the attorney.
The iPad connection.
I’ve heard this one more than a few times. Many people login to their social media accounts and/or have their Messages also set up on an iPad. They also tend to forget that they left themselves logged in and everything they are saying and doing is also seen on the iPad. I’ve heard of men watching their wives’ online affairs happen in real time. I’ve heard of children discovering affairs in this way. Yes, people do stupid things. People in affairs do really stupid things.
Track her car.
This one surprises a lot of guys. Yes, there are ways you can track her car and see exactly where she is going at all times. She says she’s just going to the library to study or maybe to meet some friends for drinks? You can watch as her car ends up on the wrong side of town.
There are small GPS devices that can connect to the car via a magnet, and have an extremely long battery life… AND they allow you to watch a car’s whereabouts in real time via an app on your phone. That is some next level spy stuff. Click here to see one that I recommend. I would place it under the car, away from any moving parts, and preferably tucked behind something so she can’t see it if she goes snooping around or takes the car in for an oil change.
Secretely record her conversations.
Many times a wayward wife will have secret telephone conversations with her affair partner. To avoid having the calls show up on the phone bill, she may use apps like Facetime or Whatsapp. Usually these conversations take place in her car while she’s driving and away from her pesky husband and kids. Lucky for you, there’s a way you can hear what she is saying.
There are devices called “Voice Activated Recorders“. Just like it sounds, these small recording devices have microphones that are triggered by sound. Once somebody near the device starts making noise, the device starts recording. These gadgets are great for placing under the driver or passenger seat of the car (preferably attached securely under the seat with duct tape or velcro). If your wife starts talking on her phone, it will pick up her voice and start recording. At a later time, you grab the device out of her car and listen to what was recorded. You may have to sit through a lot of nonsense noise, pointless conversations and her singing along to the radio… but you may also get the crucial evidence that you need.